Health for life

So Ive been thinking a lot lately about New Years Resolutions, and why they so often fail.  I see it every year in the gym... As soon as January 2nd hits, that place turns into a mad house, a clusterfuck if you will.  A clusterfuck full of everyday, hardworking people who have been neglecting their health all year long, especially over the recent holiday season, and are now determined to get in shape and lose weight.  But this clusterfuck never lasts.  It slowly ebbs away as the winter months go on, finally reaching a low in the Spring and Summer when the weather is nice and people return to their normal lives.  Hey, at least it gives people something to focus on other than the harshness of post-holiday Winter.

Of course not everyone fails in their New Years Resolutions; about 12% of us succeed, according to a 2007 study (1).  Thats right... just 12% succeed...  88% fail.  This year, 9 out of 10 of us will fail with our resolutions.  And what do we want?  No surprise, weight loss tops the list (2).

Why the horrible success rate?  Why do we fail at our goals to begin with?  And how can we be successful?  After some serious reading and thinking, Ive come up with the following:  three things you can do to succeed in your New Years resolution this year!

1.)  Set goals that are consistent with who you are.
Perhaps the most important thing you can do before you set a goal... know yourself and your values.  I cant stress this enough.  Sean Croxton wrote a great article about this topic here, I highly recommend it.  You need to do some soul searching.  If the things that you value most are your family, your business, education, religion, and the New York Giants... maybe you need to rethink your goal of losing 100 pounds this year.  I dont see health, nutrition, or exercise anywhere in that list, so unless you plan on denouncing football and God in the process, you wont find long-term success there.  Theres nothing wrong with not caring about health.  Everybody is different, everybody has different values.  Know yourself, be confident in what you stand for, and set goals that make sense for you.  

But just because you dont value health as much as other things in your life, that doesnt mean you cant have a successful health-related resolution this year.  Just gauge your resolution to the value you place on it.  If you only kinda-sorta care, theres nothing wrong with setting yourself a goal that lects that...  something relatively easy, like giving up soda.  You dont have to change the world here if youre not so inclined.  Just know who you are, and know the level of commitment youre willing to put into it.


2.)  Make sure youre doing it for the right reasons.
At the deepest level, behind every human action lies one of two emotions:  fear or love.  Setting a New Years resolution out of fear is a dead end street.  If your goal is to lose weight, ask yourself why you want to lose weight.  Is it because youre afraid of being unattractive?  Are you afraid of having a heart attack?  Afraid that you dont look like a Victorias Secret model?  If you set a resolution out of fear, then at the deepest level, you dont really want it.  Youll find that even if you do get there, the fear still remains. 

On the other hand, if you want to lose weight because you love the way you feel at that weight, because you love your life and you want to stick around for a while, or because you love being the best person you can be... then carry on.  If you do it from a place of love, you will get the return on investment youre looking for.  Recognizing whether you are coming from a place of love or a place of fear isnt easy; it requires a lot of self-lection.  Its a fine line, but its a crucial concept.  It could be the difference between success and failure.  Dont do it because youre afraid of what others think of you... fuck everyone else.  Do it for you.


3.)  Set goals that are realistic and attainable.
Now that youve got the first two covered, you need to set a goal that is realistic, and perhaps more importantly, it needs to be conducive to long-term success.  In other words, dont try to lose 50 pounds by February.  A.)  You wont.  B.)  Youll feel like a failure.  and C.)  You wont maintain it.  And if youve never weighed less than 150 pounds in your adult life, dont set your goal weight at 110 pounds.  It will not happen.  Accept it.

You would be wise to set both long-term and short-term goals.  Set a long-term, overarching goal youd like to achieve, and set short-term goals that get you there.  Lets say you want to lose 30 pounds by the end of the year.  Thats totally attainable.  Divide 30 by 12 and you get 2.5 pounds per month.  Shoot for 2-3 pounds of weight loss a month as your goal.  If you lose more than that, great.  But keep your goals modest and keep your long-term goal in sight.  The constant success will keep you motivated and you might even hit your goal before you planned to.  If you do, good for you!  I know I know... slow, gradual weight loss isnt sexy, but its the only way to go if you want to keep the weight off long-term.  Its far easier to implement a minor lifestyle modification than an intensive one, especially over the long haul.  If you set out to eat zero carbs, and exercise 2 hours every day, youll fail.  Quickly.  Take your time, dont get carried away, and keep your long-term goal in mind... theres no rush.


There you have it.  Three bits of advice to aid you this year in your New Years resolution.  I hope this helps someone out there.  Has anyone had success with their resolutions in the past?  How did you do it?  And what are people going for this year?  Id love to hear from you in the comments!

You know what, sweet readers? I’m tired of doing the same ol’ link roundup each Friday. So, this week, I thought I’d change it up and present you with my top ten very favorite things in life. (It’s kind of like Oprah’s list, except no one gets a Volvo in the end.) For special fun, let’s count ‘em down backwards. Hope you enjoy!

10) Golf
Is it a sport? A game? A hobby? A long walk over interminable greens taken by doughy white guys (and Tiger Woods) for eons at a time, narrated by men who are actually whispering, so as not to awaken the seniors who have mistaken the course for their retirement home living rooms? Only god and my dad know for sure.

9) The finale of Roseanne
(SPOILER ALERT) C’mon. You know Dan should have died in Season 5, anyway.

8) The country of Andorra
Once upon a time, I rode with family and friends through terrifying mountains and aneurysm-inducing switchbacks to reach this fine nation, one of the smallest in the world, only to find it’s a big mall for Vespa helmets. But the fine selection of Andorran Sausages (bologna), procured at a rustic local eatery (old diner), consumed next to an awe-inducing collection of European athletes (Luxembourg’s Winter Olympic team – not kidding) made up for the scooter ephemera.

7) Hootie and the Blowfish
Who didn’t hear “Only Want to Be With You” all through high school – in cars and restaurants, Starbucks bathrooms and Girl Scout potlucks, Buddhist retreats and Catholic mausoleums? I can only assume its demanding melody and complex lyrics (“I only wanna be with you / I only wanna be with you”) still resound for young Republicans even today.

6) Sandra Lee’s Baked Potato Ice Cream Recipe
It’s ice cream, dressed like a potato! Think of it like pizza in a lima bean suit, or Jon Hamm wearing a Kim Jong-il costume, or something that you love made to look homely and kind of melting. Sweet!

5) The subway
I wouldn’t trade any of it, whether it’s the surprisingly powerful 94-year-old woman elbowing me on to the third rail, the Williamsburg manorexic ironically wearing the same eyeglasses I was forced to don all through elementary school, or the seemingly button-down businessman clipping his nails over a screeching pack of Park Slope seventh graders all named Julian. I mean it.

4) Armando Benitez
Being a Mets fan would be great if it wasn’t for the 7th, 8th, and 9th innings of every ballgame. Fortunately, we’ve always had guys like ‘90s reliever Armando Benitez, who made sure that every pitch was as exciting as it could possibly be. Sometimes, you could actually see him thinking: Up by 12 runs against the Yankees? Let’s make this into nail-biter!

3) The Prince of Tides novel by Pat Conroy
This book makes me wish I didn’t have emotions.

2) Sinusitis
It’s really neat, that with all the junk packing our skulls – brains and muscles and arteries and whatnot – that our maker left a few holes full o’ nothin’. And it’s even neater that sometimes, those holes can get filled with stuff. And that stuff can be any color of the rainbow, and as soft and squishy or as elastic and bizarrely putty-like as you’ve ever seen. We’re like walking art projects, really, just waiting to be forcefully expectorated on to the nearest Kleenex canvas of life.

1) Mayonnaise
Wow! Mayonnaise is so …

I mean, I love the way it …

Um, so smooshy and…

Okay, you know this is an April Fool’s thing now. I can’t even pretend. Happy Friday, everybody!

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